


I Gotta Stop Doing This

by StellarLibraryLady



Series: Star Trek Winter Holidays Series [18]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Chocolate Reference, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Holidays, Humor, Language, M/M, McSpirk - Freeform, McSpirk Holiday Fest, Mild Language, Morning After, New Year's Eve, New Year's Fluff, Playing Choo Choo, Plot What Plot, Smut, Threesome, choo choo train, new year's
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-01
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-10-01 14:36:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17245967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StellarLibraryLady/pseuds/StellarLibraryLady
Summary: McCoy awakens on New Year's day to find a straggler on his floor.





	I Gotta Stop Doing This

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FandomStar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FandomStar/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Midnight Kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17240675) by [FandomStar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FandomStar/pseuds/FandomStar). 



> "Midnight Kiss" by FandomStar was such a sweet fic about two shy, hesitant guys sharing a tender first kiss that it will be difficult to imagine that it was my inspiration for this raunchy fic. But it is true. Almost immediately after reading FandomStar's fic, I began writing "I Gotta Stop Doing This." Perhaps it was written in contrast to all of the sweetness in "Midnight Kiss" and in my own "What Are You Doing New Year's, New Year's Eve."

McCoy groped his way into his bathroom, squinted as he turned up the lights, reconsidered, and turned them down again. He moaned as he let his fingertips be his eyes as he stumbled around in the semidarkness. He ached all over, but that was what he deserved since he had apparently slept on the floor. He had to assume that fact since that was where he had just found himself with bedding draped inadequately around his chilled limbs. His sore and protesting body seemed to indicate that he'd been doing more than sleeping, though. Some party animal he was! Couldn't even make it through a few hours of celebrating with his fellow crewmembers without paying for it the next day.

He was gonna have to stop drinking like that, even if had been New Year’s Eve.

He couldn’t even remember what had happened. Was there something about Spock? And a lampshade and a game of spin the bottle? Had the Vulcan really followed him back to his quarters? Naw! Couldn’t be! Not Spock!

McCoy stumbled out of the bathroom and his toe caught on something. It felt soft, like a body. In fact, exactly like a body. Then the body moved.

“Hmm?” Sure as hell sounded like Spock, if Spock was slurring his words. Couldn’t be Spock. He never slurred his voice.

“Leonard? Is that you?” There was a definite whine of protest in the quivering voice that still sounded like Spock. “Why did you kick me?”

McCoy couldn’t believe it! “Spock?! Is that you?!” 

“I used to be known as the entity who called himself ‘Spock’… in another lifetime.” He squinted his eyes shut in pain. “Or so it seems.”

“Wait a minute! Do you have a… a hangover?! But that’s not possible!”

“You found enough chocolate for me to perform, Doctor. Milk shakes. Doughnuts. Cream filled and nougat candies." Spock smiled in satisfaction with his eyes closed. "And might I say that chocolate worked amazingly well for stimulation and endurance. And then, after awhile, you began to taste like chocolate to me, too. You were a delight. To my tongue. As it slid all over your body.” He shivered, then sighed with contentment.

McCoy felt hot and cold all over. He was remembering a raspy tongue on his skin and groans of passion from the owner of that tongue. And the feel of wet saliva all over his body. And the sensation of dried, sticky saliva all over his body, saliva that was sticky with the sugar from candy. And then more shuddering went all over McCoy, but it wasn’t all caused by dirty places on his skin that needed to be washed clean from sticky candy and dried saliva. It had to do with the owner of that damned raspy tongue and the magic it possessed.

“What a beautiful body you have," Spock said with a contented sigh. "Bring it back to me,” he begged as he held out a hand. “Come down on the floor with me and let me touch that beautiful body of yours again. Let me run my tongue all over you again. I promise to be more loving this time.”

There were so many questions that McCoy wanted to ask, that he needed to ask. But he asked the most obvious one at the moment. “The floor?! Are you crazy?! What in the hell’s wrong with the bed?!”

“Not enough room,” Spock mumbled as his hand sank down.

“What in the hell were you needing so much room?!”

“You were needing the room, Leonard, not I. I was content as long as I could get between your legs. And thankfully, what I wanted to do to you can be done in a very small space. It was more delightful that way,” he murmured. "Although spread far apart has a lot to recommend it, also. The visuals are simply stunning and leave little to the imagination. An artist would go mad with the inspiration to his senses, not to say to his penis."

There went those hot and cold feelings again over McCoy. 

“You mean we, ah….”

“Oh, yes, Leonard,” Spock replied happily. “We went at it quite often. You could not seem to get enough of me. I was most happy to comply with your needs.”

Maybe he had malaria, McCoy thought as his body was wracked with fluctuating temperature changes in a matter of moments again. No one should feel hot and cold all over like this so much.

“Of course, I could not seem to get enough of you, either. We have wasted so much time, Doctor. So we decided to correct that mistake. That was our New Year’s resolution, and a sound one it was indeed. We planned to have each other as much as we are able.”

“So I guess you got drunk on chocolate and threw all of your inhibitions out the window. You took advantage of me while I was in a compromised state of inebriation from my own consumption of alcohol.”

One Vulcan eyebrow arched in a knowing manner. “Oh, Leonard, it was your idea.” He smiled. “And a delightful one it was, if I must say so. You were not raped, Doctor. Far from it.” 

What the hell?! McCoy had lost that much control?! He felt out of control now. Their relationship had changed overnight, and he could not remember the change.

“Make up your mind!” he lashed out. “Doctor, or Leonard?! Which is it to be?!”

“Oh, darling,” Spock cooed. “I will take you either way. Just so you respond to me, and I heartily believe that you will.”

“I think I liked you better when you were a snide prick,” McCoy muttered, not expecting an answer.

“Oh, Leonard, whichever way I get you, I will be your delighted prick.”

“You don’t even know what that word means!”

“I do now. You are a most delightful teacher. There was quite an educational exchange last night.”

“I think I’m going to be ill….”

“I can remedy all of that, if you will only come down here with me.”

McCoy studied the reclining man reaching up for him. “You know that you are as naked as a jay bird, don’t you?”

“So are you, Doctor. Or had you not realized that tempting fact?”

McCoy glanced down. Yep. Naked as a jay bird, too. Nothing wrong with the Vulcan’s eyesight, even in this dim lighting. But McCoy felt the same way that Adam and Eve must’ve felt after the scales fell away from their eyes and they discovered that they were naked. Then they found a whole lot more interesting things to do with their time in the Garden of Eden than naming all of the animals and eating forbidden fruit.

“You say that we, ah….” McCoy started, to hide his embarrassment.

“Oh, yes, we most certainly did, Leonard. Many times. I find that I am now quite exhausted, but it is a delightful state of exhaustion to be in. And I feel my hangover leaving already.”

A new, terrifying thought struck McCoy. “Did we horse around like that at the New Year’s Eve party? Did we do raunchy stuff in front of our crew mates?”

“I believe that we participated in what I have heard referred to as an orgy, except it was just for the two of us while the crew watched. You started it,” Spock quickly added before McCoy could accuse him again of taking advantage.

“Oh, hell!” McCoy moaned.

“You wanted me to demonstrate a satyr’s way of making love. You said that it would be educational for the rest of the crew to illustrate the technique that I must surely have mastered and which you would like to be the recipient of. You figured that I was built like a satyr and would be more than willing to prove it.”

“I’ll never be able to face those people again!” McCoy rued.

“Do not worry. We did not engage in sexual relations in the Day Room. We waited until we got into your quarters. We merely pantomimed for the crew.”

“Thank heaven for small miracles,” McCoy said in relief.

“Yes, we waited until we got into your quarters,” Spock with a hard edge to his voice. “And then I was allowed to get into your real quarters, the place where your legs are joined together. And may I say, a lovely juncture that is, too,” he noted as McCoy moaned in anguish.

“The crew may not have seen what happened between us, but they probably figured it out for themselves, don’t you imagine?”

Spock looked smug. “It would not take much imagination to assume what happened to us.” Then he talked through McCoy’s next groan of regret. “Even an innocent child would have realized that I was very interested in exploring that lovely juncture between your outstretched legs.”

“Must you be so… vulgar and explicit?!”

Spock was startled. “Leonard, I am not the one who was moaning when I rubbed my face in the crinkly hair in your pubic area. You said that it tickled, and I noted that it felt like a brier patch.”

“I never knew that you were so coarse and common.”

“You brought it out in me,” Spock said with satisfaction. "Now I rather like the common life."

“Oh, hell, now I’m responsible for someone’s moral downfall! What will Jim think about all of this? You are his pride and joy. He won’t like what my depravity has done to you.”

“Why not ask him?”

“Jim is here?!”

Spock looked around. “He is in these blankets somewhere.” He started feeling around in the bedding littering the floor.

“Jim... Jim saw what we did in here?!”

Spock looked at McCoy patiently. “He was part of what we did in here.”

“What?! Jim?! Too?!”

“He particularly liked it when we formed a choo choo train,” Spock answered as he patted bedding in his search for his beloved captain.

“A choo choo train?! How--?!” But McCoy was afraid of the answer.

Spock looked up at McCoy, less patiently this time. “You were in the middle, Leonard. Use your imagination.” His patting hands hit something. “Ah!” He tossed back the blanket to expose a foot. “Goodies further up,” he predicted with a lewd smile as he raked the blanket up Kirk's exposed leg.

McCoy pinched his eyes shut as Kirk’s naked rump came into view.

“Hmm? What?” Kirk protested as he tried to look away from the light.

Spock scooted closer and kissed a spot high on Kirk’s leg. “Good morning, Captain.”

“Remind me to pig out on chocolate the next time I wanna go on a bender,” Kirk mumbled. “The Vulcan is positively glowing and not showing any signs of a hangover.”

“I am drunk on love instead, Captain.” Spock’s smile held the promise of all kinds of sugar behind it.

Kirk opened an eyelid and squinted up at McCoy. “Has he been this way all the time since he woke up, Bones?”

“Pretty much.”

"Still horny as hell. And I would've thought that we had him pumped dry," Kirk muttered. "Chocolate must give him hellish staying power."

"I am only here to serve both of you," Spock said proudly.

McCoy felt a definite tug in the more basic animal instinct part of his body. It only helped to fuel his imagination more. And he was imagining a lot of neat stuff with Spock and Kirk, stuff that would probably add a lot to the information which he had been trying to convey to the rest of the crew during the night before.

Kirk sighed and turned away. “Either put on some clothes, Bones, or get down here with us. You’re getting excited, and I don’t mean just in your mind.”

“He is being an old grump this morning, Jim.”

“I’m being logical this morning!” McCoy roared back. “And I am apparently the only voice of reason in this room!”

“Dr. McCoy, get down here with us at once, and leave your damned logic behind! That’s an order!” Kirk snarled. Then he gave McCoy a lazy grin. “Because I wanna play choo choo train with you two guys again.”

If he had been in the middle as Spock had told him, that would explain why McCoy was sore both forward and aft.

“I like the way that you conduct me, Bonesy. I like being coupled to you.” He winked. "It's time for the Enterprise Express to leave the train station. It's way behind for what we got scheduled and we gotta make up for lost time."

“Oh, hell,” McCoy muttered as he got down on the floor with his two best friends. “I gotta stop doing this shit if I can't remember doing it. I'm getting too old for it.” He shrugged. "But not today." The truth of the matter was that McCoy was finally remembering just how much he had also enjoyed playing choo choo train. He had particularly enjoyed it when their railroad cars had banged up against each other.

And that probably accounted for a lot of his soreness forward and aft, too.

He also had a feeling that he was soon going to be feeling a whole lot sorer.

But what the hell! It was New Year's and time to celebrate!

"Choo! Choo!" Spock yelled as he grabbed McCoy's hips. Kirk giggled like a teenaged girl as McCoy grabbed him. Then McCoy braced himself for his encounter with Spock. He'd seen that Spock was more than ready for action. This train was barely going to make it beyond the station before it was nicely coupled together.

Now if McCoy only lived long enough to make it to the second day of the new year. He knew that his two best friends were going to try their hardest today to kill him with love.

McCoy grinned as he hammered into Kirk while Spock plowed into him. Yeah, he well might die from ecstasy today.

But what a way to go!

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing of Star Trek, its characters, and/or its story lines.


End file.
